Long Distance Relationships

Remember when you were a kid and you met that special girl at summer camp?  She wasn't like the girls back home, she was different.  You fell head over flip-flops for her.  You came home and thought of her often, you longed for her.  You told your best friends about her sandy blonde hair, about how she was driving with a farm permit at 14, and how she liked to go muddin' in her truck.  A truck!  What kind of girl drives a truck?  The best kind.

You might have begged your parents to call long-distance, and surely you traded some hand-written letters (complete with Elvis Presley stamp, to let her know how cool you were).  High-school resumed, and even with myriad distractions she wasn't far from your thoughts.  Summer began to give way to autum, and the dank mornings were replaced with a refreshing crispness that confirmed the changing seasons.  You decided you would ask her to be your date for Homecoming.  Then, one by one, the logistical challenges of a long distance relationship revealed themselves to you in earnest.  It just wasn't going to work out.

Fast-forward 15 years.  Things have changed quite a bit.  You've settled down, married, maybe have a couple rugrats crawling about.  But, you still have that long-distance relationship.  At least I do.  And just like Jenny from summer camp, my close friends know about it.  They've heard how the dogs usually wind them from a distance, how they always explode as a group at the exact moment you're admiring your dog's stylish point, and how they're screech pierces your ears as they rocket away.  As I type this my bags are packed, collars are charged, boots are treated, and the gun is cleaned.  This is one long distance relationship that works just fine.